08.03 - 15.03

I haven’t been eating well lately, mainly cause of the schedule, but something weird happens: whenever I am alone somewhere (by alone I mean not with people that I know) I just end up with at least a fat dude / dudette eating next to me.
- I’m at the stop sign, there’s a big man stuffing his face with some food to my right;
- I’m in the train, alone in the compartment, I fall asleep – 10 minutes later I get disturbed by some munching sounds coming from a person with weight issues who just moved in with me;
- I want to talk to the boss about a raise: sorry, not now, he’s eating.
Rosie O’Donnel, it’s all your fault!

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StarCraft II: Zerg announced

 

This is actually the biggest thing that happened last week: just like birds like to fly, Windows likes to crash, or grandpa likes to shoot hippies, Blizzard likes to tease us. Under the "StarCraft II is not out yet, BUT..." concept, these guys managed to draw our attention by revealing the last remaining race to be revealed: the Zerg. And guess what? They didn't fail; the news was all over the place, like fear at the circus shows that include clown acts.


StarCraft II: Zerg Q&A


It was obvious that Blizzard would advertise the Zerg as much as possible, so a special Q&A batch was something everyone wanted and expected. As usual, the important questions were answered with something along the lines of "we don't/can't/won't tell you that yet, BUT we can describe general things about gaming and add the word StarCraft every once in a while". But I know that Blizzard knows this isn't their biggest concern right now. It's just like if you have a dead hooker in the trunk of your car, the blood stain on your favorite T-shirt is probably not the most important thing at that moment.


MYM KOTH: Gentleman > CastrO


This time the MYM KOTH was way better than the rest. Forget the show, the skill or whatever. *advisor sound* Bad manner detected! Someone's being a wuss! That's right kids: CastrO couldn't handle the huge amount of rectal punishment that GENTLEman provided, so he naturally had to find excuses. He actually found a good one: he said that the game was paused so that Gentleman could go to another computer and watch the stream so he would see CastrO's base and shit. Now seriously, CastrO, are you even trying? Guys like these deserve pineapples shoved up their tailpipes. 3 times a day.


StarCraft II: Koreans test the game


Let's face it: StarCraft without Koreans is like Tom without Jerry, Hell without lawyers, your hard drive without porn, your boss without his blue pills or my hard drive without porn. The guys at Blizzard know this, so they gathered 10 StarCraft and 1 WarCraft III (???) progamers to test their newest concoction, StarCraft II. Please note Moon's outfit, which is basically mind-dazzling. When asked about the game, they answered in Korean, but they were sketching some nice facial movements, which only made us believe that they enjoyed it. We're pretty sure we don't want to know all the details; we're just interested in the results, just like the members of a fraternity after a vicious campus party or your teenage daughter's last night so-called slumber party.


Strelok wins WGTour Finale


Strelok was the man to win - you guessed it - a € 100 StarCraft tournament, WGT's Finale Tour to be precise. And since you can't spell ‘slaughter' without ‘laughter', you have to know that Strelok actually enjoyed every minute of the carnage that he laid upon those poor bastards that participated. I have to be honest: Strelok is a monster of a player (when he's not coming by your house to collect the protection fee), so this victory of his is not really surprising. If Jesus was Ukrainian (and alive) he would be proud of Strelok.


GameSports sponsors StarCraft Cup


It's getting harder and harder to write about € 100 StarCraft tournaments, I just feel it. Come on, man, do it for the starving kids in Zimbabwe! But I thought that was Angelina's turf... Well anyways, after Jim Carrey disappointed me , I really wasn't expecting another tourney just like this one. I mean, I'd rather see one of my work female colleagues getting eaten by beavers in 20 minutes (well I'd actually like to see this happen no matter what) or watch a Robin Williams ‘comedy' film, which is, in certain states, an alternative to life in prison.

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BONUS : Mommy's little princess has the cutest dance ever. And the doggy is nice too.

BONUS 2 : Gotta catch 'em all.

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